As a coach and former player, one of the most common mistakes I observe parents make is getting emotionally involved in a youth athletic game. Although they mean well and are trying to show their support, coaching from the sidelines is more hurtful than helpful to young athletes.
Many athletes I work with have shared that one of the biggest distractions impacting their performance and confidence is the “cheering” from parents during competition. Spectators might feel as though comments like, “take the shot”, “kick it”, or “get them” are phrases to show their support, it can have a negative impact on a player’s self-esteem and development.
It can be difficult to sit back and watch your athlete make mistakes or not give what you think is their best effort. When you are critical or giving excessive feedback, it can backfire. When fans dictate to players what decisions to make during a game, they miss out on crucial opportunities to develop decision-making skills and learn from their mistakes. Players with parents who coach from the sidelines can come to rely on them for feedback, which can become a distraction or compete with feedback that their coach or teammates are trying to provide.
To understand the impact of coaching from the sidelines, you must take a step back and remind yourself why your athlete is playing their sport. Many choose to play to be a part of a team, or burn off steam, and aren’t as focused on winning and excelling as you might be. When families and coaches put emphasis on achievement rather than effort and experience, players are likely to burn out and stop enjoying their sport.
Finally, adults need to remember that athletes who are going to excel in their sport need an internal drive to work hard and stay focused. This drive comes from a passion they have developed for their sport. This really can’t be taught or coached. No amount of yelling or cheering will create passion for a sport. Be patient and let your athlete take the lead!
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